


The Demons You Fight (I Fight With You)

by chasethewind



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, Major Character Injury, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-04
Updated: 2013-12-04
Packaged: 2018-01-03 10:38:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1069480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chasethewind/pseuds/chasethewind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I’m sorry, Oliver.” She was apologizing again, something he wished she wouldn’t do because none of this was her fault. But before he could protest, Felicity added, “I’m sorry I made you worry. I’m sorry I made you kill again. I’m sorry I broke the promise I made to you a few weeks ago. I shouldn’t have gone off by myself to follow that lead. I should have waited for you, but I was stupid and…” Tears threatened to spill down her cheeks again as her lower lip began to tremble.</p>
<p>The follow up to "My Faith In You Never Wavers" with 2x07 spoilers if you haven't seen the episode.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Demons You Fight (I Fight With You)

**Author's Note:**

> This took FAR too long to finish, but it's done and I'm happy with the final product! Hope y'all like it as well!
> 
> Thanks to hopedreamlovepray, anthfan and girlwithsixsmiles for the beta.

How did they always end up here, curled around each other in her tiny bed, one harrowing experience after another? Oliver had asked himself that question a thousand times already and he still couldn't find the answer. It just felt right.

Tonight was no exception. The entire day had been one hell of a rollercoaster ride, starting with his mother's trial and ending with saving Felicity's life from the Count. Speaking of Felicity, she'd fallen asleep an hour ago curled up against his side, her legs wrapped around his beneath her magenta and white striped down comforter. Oliver had pulled it around them the moment she'd climbed into bed after her shower.

When she'd first mentioned she would be taking one, he'd wanted to take it with her considering how he'd found her after the Mathis incident, but Felicity could be just as stubborn as he was. She insisted she'd be okay and that it wouldn't be an issue. Oliver remained close though, sitting on the hardwood floor beside the bathroom door just in case she needed him.

After about ten minutes of waiting, the water had shut off and she'd climbed out without incident. He was quickly up from his post and in her bedroom, changing out of his suit into sweats and a t-shirt before she found a reason to be angry with him.

Felicity wandered in a few minutes later with a towel wrapped around her hair, wearing faded pink sweats and his sweater she now lay claim to. Oliver didn't mind. A slight bit of possessiveness flowed through him whenever he saw her wrapped in something that was his. His favorite thing as of late had been his dress shirts. The pang of desire that hit him whenever he found her wearing one of them in the morning almost ruined their day.

But tonight her routine remained the same. He understood her need for normalcy. Felicity had been through quite a lot in the last eighteen hours. Doing something familiar allowed the mind to focus on a single task instead of wander into territory better left uncharted. Oliver was trying to do that now as he gazed down at her sleeping form, but kept failing miserably.

He'd almost lost her tonight, truly lost her. The thought alone sent a chill so deep down his spine, he could feel it in his bones. He couldn't comprehend how she had been so willing to give up her life just so he would keep his vow to Tommy and not kill again.

"Oliver, don't! Not for me," Felicity had desperately told him as the Count held two syringes full of Vertigo to her neck. Fear permeated her voice, but he hadn't done what she'd asked. He'd lowered his bow instead, trying to get the Count to release her since this vendetta had been between the two of them and she shouldn't have been involved in the first place. For a moment Oliver thought he could reason with the man once he dropped the syringes from her neck, but that wouldn't be the case.

The Count had no intention of letting Felicity go. He was going to hurt her no matter what happened. As soon as the needles were pressed to her neck once more, Oliver didn't think, he just reacted. One arrow, followed closely behind by a second then a third, hit the Count square in the chest. He stumbled backwards, his body crashing through the already weakened plate glass window behind him, and fell several stories down until he hit an unoccupied taxi.

At that moment, Oliver had felt nothing but relief flood through him as he made his way to Felicity's side to make sure she was okay. His heart clenched in his chest when he noticed her still shaking and crying as he kneeled down in front of her. It was like trying to calm a wild animal, but once her gaze fell on him, he immediately saw the change in her demeanor.

Shoulders went slack and the tension in her body eased out of her. His hand came to rest against her neck, feeling the thrum of her rapidly beating heart beneath his gloved fingers. The look in Felicity's eyes was one of pure relief as he reassured her everything was okay. When her fingers wrapped around his wrist, a pang of something more powerful than relief ran through him, something he had refused to acknowledge at that moment.

What caught Oliver off guard, though, was the fact that once she realized he'd been shot, Felicity's immediate concern had become him instead of herself. She was deflecting, something he understood well, and when she reached out to lay her hand against his injured arm, he had to reassure her that it was nothing. Taking a bullet to the shoulder was nothing compared to the possibility of losing her. He'd choose the bullet every time if it meant she would be okay.

In the moments that followed, Oliver had gently picked her up and carried her down the stairs, her legs too wobbly to stand on. He ignored the searing pain that shot through his arm until they were out of the building. It was then that he set her down and wrapped his good arm around her waist to keep her steady until they reached his car.

He drove them straight to the foundry to change back into the suit he'd worn to court, had Diggle patch up his wound, and was gone again without being able to check on Felicity before he left. Oliver had wanted nothing more than to stay there and hold her through the rest of the night, but he knew the verdict would be delivered soon. Besides, the way he'd run out on Thea meant he had some explaining to do when he returned.

The drive back to the courthouse had been silent, leaving Oliver to relive the moments he almost lost Felicity. For the first time since driving an arrow through Malcolm Merlyn's heart six months earlier, he'd killed again, breaking the vow he'd made to Tommy. He knew his best friend would forgive him. Felicity's life was on the line. Had he not shot the Count, she wouldn't be here now, curled up at his side sleeping peacefully as if nothing had happened.

Oliver glanced down at her for a moment, his hand ruffling through the loose strands of her blonde hair before he pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

But what really had gotten to him was what she'd said once he returned to the foundry later that night to check on his friends. After Diggle had gone, Felicity approached him with a thank you followed by something that would leave him reeling.

"And I'm sorry…" she'd said, her eyes begging him to accept her apology. She was wrapped up tightly in that grey blanket they kept around in case of emergencies, her fingers digging into its woolen material as the guilt flashed across her face.

"For what?" Oliver had been slightly confused for a moment. He didn't understand why she needed to apologize to him. If anything, he should have apologized to her for even putting her in this kind of situation in the first place.

"I got myself into trouble again and you killed him. You killed again and I am sorry that I put you in the position where you had to make that kind of choice." Felicity was holding back her emotions, but they were written in her eyes. She'd made a promise to him a month earlier, saying she wouldn't seek out danger, a promise she'd broken and was now wordlessly begging for his forgiveness.

His heart broke, shattering into a million little pieces when he saw the regret etched on her face. Felicity truly was sorry for being the reason he'd killed again. He couldn't let her do that to herself. He couldn't let her take the blame for something that wasn't her fault. The Count had always been after him. She was just in the wrong place at the wrong time, a victim of circumstance. But the danger had been all too real. If he hadn't taken the shot, she wouldn't have been there right now.

"Felicity... He had you and he was going to hurt you. There was no choice to make." And Oliver meant it as his hand slipped over hers and gave it a little squeeze as if to say all was forgiven.

He didn't regret his decision to shoot the Count. This had been the third time they'd come up against each other. His only regret was not killing him the first time around. All of this could have been avoided had the police not interfered when they did.

But here was his Felicity, safe and sound, her head tucked under his arm with her powder blue painted fingers resting lightly just above his heart. Oliver felt her breaths, steady and even against his t-shirt. Turning so that his arms could envelop her completely, he closed his eyes and let his chin fall to the top of her head.

Oliver didn't regret his decision to sneak out of the house that night after everyone had gone to bed either. He knew he'd find Felicity pacing her bedroom, her lower lip worried between her teeth and still dressed in the clothes she'd worn that day.

He also knew she'd have trouble sleeping. After all that had happened with Mathis, it took her almost a week to get comfortable alone in her bed again, and even then he would sit outside her window just in case she needed him. A full two weeks passed before her nightmares abated and she was able to sleep soundly.

But this experience with the Count was a whole other ballgame. This time she'd been held hostage for a good few hours before Oliver had been able to free her. He didn't want to know what kinds of nightmares Felicity would have after this experience, but they were bound to happen. All he wanted was to be there to comfort her just in case she needed him.

And she would. Not even a few minutes after he'd closed his eyes, Oliver could feel the beat of Felicity's heart begin to increase. Her breaths became quick and shallow before her entire body tensed and she began to mumble incoherently against his chest.

"Felicity," he whispered in her ear, hoping it was enough to wake her. When her fingers curled into the fabric of his t-shirt, he repeated her name, a little more loudly this time, but it still wouldn't rouse her.

She began to whimper, tears appearing at the corners of her tightly shut eyes. Her head began to thrash about as she screamed, "No! OLIVER!"

That was when he grabbed her shoulders and gently shook her until her eyes shot open. They were wild with fear, her breaths coming out in short gasps as he let go and brought his hands up to cup her cheeks. "Shh, it's okay. You're okay. I'm here. You're safe," he soothed, his fingers wiping the tears that now flowed freely from her eyes.

"Oliver?" she whimpered once her vision cleared and she could finally see him staring down at her. A shuddering breath escaped her lungs as she blinked several times trying to erase the dream from her mind.

He gave her a comforting smile before leaning in for a chaste kiss. Felicity calmed considerably, her heartbeat slowing to a more normal pace as she pressed her forehead to his and swallowed back the emotions that continued to rage in her expressive eyes. "I'm here. You're safe," Oliver repeated, stroking his thumbs over her cheekbones.

She leaned in, her lips pressing to his for a soft kiss before her arms wrapped around his neck. It became more demanding when Felicity pushed him onto his back and straddled his thighs. Oliver could feel the desperation in the way her mouth slanted over his, her teeth sinking into his lower lip forcing his lips to part. Her fingers tangled in his hair to pull him as close as physically possible.

When her tongue slipped over his and began dueling for dominance, Oliver knew something was wrong. Part of his brain told him he needed to stop this, to keep Felicity from going into self destruct mode, but a far more dominant part reminded him that he'd used sex as a way to relieve stress so many times before and that it wasn't fair to judge her for trying to as well. As her fingers raked down his sides and slid beneath the hem of his shirt, he gave in fully.

Her lips frantically nipped their way down his neck. This wasn't the kind of foreplay he was used to with Felicity. She was usually the soft and gentle one while he would take charge, leaving bite marks across her skin. Tonight, though, she was the dominant one, and made it all that much clearer when she grabbed the hem of his shirt, pulling it off his body so quickly Oliver barely had time to think.

He knew he should stop her, talk to her about her nightmare, try to calm her down, but her desperation had taken hold and there wasn't much he could do. Felicity needed release, and if sex was the way she'd get it, then he would go along for the ride. As her lips slid down his chest, he sucked in a breath when they wrapped around his nipple and gave it a light nip before moving across to the other one and lavishing it with the same attention.

Leaving a trail of wet, open mouth kisses along his abdomen, Felicity finally stopped at the waistband of his sweats. She grasped the edges of the worn cotton material and began yanking it down until Oliver was left in only a pair of black boxers.

She returned to his lips, wantonly ravaging them with deep, needy kisses as her fingers grasped the zipper of her sweatshirt and pulled it down. It was thrown to the floor beside his shirt leaving her naked from the waist up. Grabbing his hands without breaking their kiss, she pressed them to her breasts and he took the hint.

The soft mounds always felt amazing in his palms. He loved the way they seemed to fit perfectly into his hands as he ran his thumbs across her taut nipples, eliciting a moan from deep in her throat that vibrated through her chest. "Yes, just like that," Felicity whispered against his lips as her eyes slammed shut.

It was the first time she'd ever been vocal about what she wanted, and although Oliver liked it, he couldn't enjoy it seeing the way she kept her eyes screwed shut. "Hey," he whispered back, pulling one hand away from her breast to cup her cheek.

Felicity's eyes popped open and he immediately saw the frenzied look of passion and fear swirling around in those aquamarine orbs. "Please," she begged, her voice low and breathy. "I need this. I need you."

All Oliver could do was nod. He understood why she needed this. There was no reason to judge her for wanting it so badly. So, putting aside all his reservations, he went back to fondling her breasts just as she'd wanted him to. Tonight he would do whatever she asked, never daring to question her.

Blue eyes slipped closed once more as Felicity threw her head back to enjoy the way his calloused fingers stroked her soft skin. She reached behind her, slipping her hand beneath his boxers to wrap around his cock and slowly stroke him to attention. Pushing the nagging voice in his head telling him this needed to stop to the back of his mind, Oliver let himself enjoy her ministrations until he was at full attention.

Her free hand wrapped around his wrist, slowly dragging one of his hands away from her breast until it was nestled between her legs. Grinding her hips against it, Oliver understood what she wanted and slipped it beneath the pink fabric to feel nothing but smooth skin. He sought out her slit, fingers sliding between the soft folds to find moisture already gathering at her entrance.

It took all his willpower to keep from thrusting two fingers into her. Instead, Oliver gently stroked upward until his thumb brushed over her clit. Above him, Felicity shuddered, a moan escaping her lips as she gave his cock a light squeeze. "More!" she cried, her hips once again grinding against his hand for the pleasure it sent through her body.

Oliver obediently obliged, his thumb stroking over the nub a little harder this time making her shriek out and rock slightly with his movements. "God, that feels so good," Felicity said through gritted teeth as she grabbed the hand that was still fondling her breast and squeezed it tight.

There was no denying it, Oliver was getting turned on by her show of dominance tonight. But he was also a little apprehensive about letting his guard down to fully enjoy it. Felicity had been through a lot that day and if this was any indication of where she was at mentally, he knew there was a lot she still hadn't come to terms with. So he carefully watched her for any sign of breaking even as the pain on her face slowly began turning to pleasure.

When Oliver tried to sit up and capture her lips for a kiss, her hand squarely landed on his chest, pushing him back down against the mattress. Felicity maintained the control tonight and although he was not accustomed to it, he relented easily. But she did lean down to kiss him, her lips crashing against his to make sure he understood his place.

It was distracting, to say the least. He'd always known Felicity could be assertive when need be, but Oliver thought her to be the docile one in the bedroom. Ever since they started this affair after his return from the island, she'd always yielded to him in bed. Tonight he was seeing a side of her he didn't know existed, a side he was beginning to enjoy now that the thought of losing her slipped further and further to the back of his mind.

She nipped her way down his chest again as his fingers slipped from where they'd been stroking her clit. When Felicity reached his boxers, she hooked her fingers beneath the elastic band and and pulled them off his body in one swift motion. Oliver now lay naked beneath her, hard and ready for whatever she wanted.

He gazed up at her, his eyes raking over her body as she shimmied out of her sweats before climbing back over his hips and seating herself so that her ass pressed against his cock. All this teasing was killing him. Oliver wanted nothing more than to flip her around and take her right there as he'd done so many times before, but he understood her need for control. Even though it had been taken away from her for just a short amount of time, the damage it had caused was only now beginning to show through her tough exterior.

Felicity grabbed his hands again, this time settling them on her hips as she leaned over his chest and whispered, "I'm going to fuck you until you're begging me to stop." A tingle ran down Oliver's spine. For a girl whose brain-to-mouth filter had a knack of making almost anything she said a sexual innuendo, hearing her actually talk dirty had his jaw dropping in surprise.

Upon seeing the shock on his face, Felicity merely smiled as she sat back up and reached around to grab his cock. Her hips lifted from where she'd been sitting low against his abdomen. He could feel her pressing the tip against her entrance, the hot wetness coating him just before she spread her legs and sank down on top of him.

It felt amazing being buried inside her to the hilt, her muscles clenching tightly around his cock as she gasped in absolute pleasure. A small smile had crawled onto her face as she arched her back and rolled her hips, her entire body shuddering as she did.

Every movement she made above him sent his senses into overdrive. Although Oliver was no stranger to pleasing women, this one in particular he'd always made sure to take extra care of. He didn't know if it was because Felicity was new and untainted by his previous life or if it was the bond they'd created over the past year that brought it out in him, but he always wanted to make sure her needs were met before taking care of his own. And that didn't just include in the bedroom.

Even in their daily lives he did everything he could to make Felicity feel special, although most of the time it was unintentional. He brought her coffee in the morning and dinner whenever they worked late. He'd also made sure to up her salary for all the things she did for him not just at Queen Consolidated, but in the lair as well. Even then he wished there was more he could to for her. For now, he'd settle for pleasing her to the best of his abilities in bed if that's what she desired.

Truth be told, there really wasn't much he wouldn't do for Felicity. Taking the Count's life when he put her in danger… It was something Oliver would forever justify as necessary because if he hadn't she wouldn't be here right now. That perfect, soft skin, those delicate features, those beautiful blue eyes would cease to exist and so would his purpose in life.

It was at that moment he realized in less than a year Felicity had gone from being a complete stranger to someone he couldn't live without, someone so important to him that he would forego his mother's murder trial verdict in order to save her life, someone he would kill for.

Oliver knew his feelings for Felicity ran deep, but this was something he'd never felt before. Not with Helena, not with McKenna, not even with Laurel had his feelings been this strong. Even when their lives had been in danger, he had never felt compelled to kill for them, not like he had with Felicity. She knew things about him he never could have told the others, things that would have scared a normal person.

But Felicity Smoak wasn't a normal person, and that's what made her so special to him. She understood him, took in all his faults and never judged him. She stood up to him and challenged him to be a better version of himself on a daily basis. She'd even gone to the ends of the earth to bring him home. There was something to be said about a woman who cared that much about a broken man like himself. She loved him, whether she knew it or not, and he loved her.

It was a revelation Oliver felt the sudden need to tamp down before the world tilted sideways and everything turned upside down. He couldn't have feelings like that for Felicity, not when he posed such a threat to her life. He was the reason the Count had held her hostage, the reason why she was constantly in danger of becoming a victim of his out of control life. No, these feelings needed to be buried before they could cause anymore damage than they already had.

Instead, Oliver chose to focus on the way her hips rose and fell over his cock. With every downward thrust, her head would roll back and she'd let out a delicious moan that reverberated throughout the room. He watched her intently as she ran her fingers through her long curled locks before they settled on her breasts.

Quickly realizing he wanted to be the one holding those soft mounds, his hands glided up her sides and wiggled their way beneath her fingers until she gazed down at him, a mischievous glint in her eyes. When he began rolling her nipples between his thumb and forefinger, Felicity leaned down to capture his mouth for a searing kiss.

"Mmm, god, yes, that's how I like it," she groaned, bracing her hands on his shoulders as she changed the angle of her hips. The slight lean caused her muscles to tighten around him as he hit the spot that gave her the most pleasure.

Oliver couldn't help the slight bit of satisfaction he got knowing he was the reason for the the contented moan that escaped her lips. Closing his eyes, he reveled in the waves of pleasure that washed over him as Felicity's hips began picking up speed. She was now almost bouncing above him, the slapping of her skin against his the only sound echoing through the room aside from their respective pants. God, she felt good.

His hands slid up from her breasts, coming to rest over her shoulders as his thumbs stroked the soft lines of her neck before they came to cup her face for a moment. He pulled her down, his mouth falling over hers as he nibbled on her lower lip before releasing her. A soft groan escaped her lips when his hands found her shoulders again, only this time one slid into her hair, tangling in the golden locks to cradle the back of her head as his hips met hers thrust for thrust.

With his head rolled back and his eyes squeeze shut in the throes of passion, Oliver couldn't see what was happening above him as she almost violently thrust herself onto his cock. He thought her strangled cries stemmed from her desire. It wasn't until he felt something wet drip onto his chest that he opened his eyes and looked at her.

Felicity's eyes were screwed shut, her face contorted not in pleasure, but in absolute agony. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she dug her nails into his shoulders, trying desperately to hold on to whatever sanity she had left. Had Oliver known she was in such a precarious mental state, he never would have let this continue. Somehow she'd managed to hide it from him better than he imagined.

Grabbing her hips, he pulled her up off him. The strangled gasp that left her lips as her eyes flew open made his heart clench. She shook as he set her down on his abdomen and wrapped his arms around her trembling shoulders, bringing her into his chest to hold her as the demons raged inside her head.

"Shh, it's okay. You're okay," Oliver murmured against her ear as one hand stroked down her bare back while the other twisted in the long strands of her golden hair at the base of her neck. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere," he added, pressing soft kisses to her forehead and temples.

Wave after wave of guilt crashed over him. This was far worse than her breakdown after he'd killed the Count. Felicity's fear consumed her to the point where she shook uncontrollably in his arms. Oliver did everything in his power to try and calm her, but he couldn't figure out what had triggered such a drastic change.

His hands swept over the shivering expanse of her back as he pressed more kisses to her temple and forehead. Muffled sobs filled the room, but no matter what he did, Felicity's tears wouldn't stop. "Just let it all out," Oliver said. "I'm not letting you go."

She cried into his chest for the next half hour, her arms wrapped tightly around his neck. At one point, he grabbed her blanket and draped it over their naked bodies hoping it would provide a little extra comfort. When Felicity's arms finally went slack and all he could hear from above him was the sound of sniffling, Oliver carefully reached up to cup her face.

"I'm sorry," she hoarsely whispered, her eyes remaining downcast as he lifted her chin. "I'm so sorry." Her lower lip trembled, tears threatening to break free once again.

"It's okay." Oliver did his best to try and comfort her. His fingers stroked over her wet cheeks, wiping away the remnants of her tears, but Felicity still refused to look at him.

"Hey," he whispered, his thumb swiping beneath her tear-stained lashes until those red-rimmed eyes finally looked at him. The true depth of her fears shown bright in those pale blue pools. "What's wrong, Felicity? Tell me what happened."

Felicity bowed her head as she took several deep, shuddering breaths. His hand fell across the side of her neck, feeling the rapid thrum of her heart beneath his palm as it hammered away. Her fear was palpable. It seeped not only into her bones, but deep into her soul as well. The sight of her shattering before him tore his heart out of his chest. Oliver wanted nothing more than to be able to take that fear and that pain away so she'd never feel it again. But what was done was done. All he could do now was try and comfort her to the best of his ability.

When her eyes finally flicked up to his, Oliver stifled the gasp that threatened to escape his lips. Felicity, his Felicity, was on the verge of completely falling apart. The brightness he once saw in her eyes was almost gone. She was a shell of her former self, and the guilt and regret that hit him knowing this was his fault overwhelmed him.

Before he could utter a desperate apology, Felicity had already begun to speak, the words tumbling from her mouth so fast he could barely understand them.

"I can't get him out of my head," she choked out. "When I close my eyes, I feel like it's happening all over again. From the moment he ambushed me to the moment you killed him. It plays over and over in my head and it doesn't want to stop. I can still hear his voice in my ear, threatening you and… His hands…" A strangled sob escaped her lips as she buried her face in Oliver's neck.

The anger rose in his chest hearing those last two words fly out of her mouth. The Count had touched her. He'd touched his Felicity in a way that she would never forget no matter how hard she tried. If he could put one more arrow in him at that moment, he would. No one was allowed to touch his girl like that. This was the only reason he needed to justify killing that deranged psychopath.

"Felicity," Oliver breathed against her ear as he placed a tender kiss to her temple in an attempt to calm the rage flowing through his veins. His fingers traced down her spine until they reached the small of her back. They stopped there to rub soothing circles into her skin.

"He touched me, Oliver!" she cried, her voice hoarse with emotions she'd been trying to hide. They ranged from anger to self loathing to disgust and made his stomach churn. "And he wouldn't stop touching me! I can still feel his hands on my shoulders or running down my arms or playing with my hair. For two hours I sat there listening to his psycho babbling while his hands…" She shut her eyes, a shudder running through her body as she swallowed back more tears. He held her tighter, willing the pain to go away. "It makes me sick! I feel dirty, like I can't take enough showers to wash it away!"

Oliver finally understood why Felicity had done what she'd done. His hands on her shoulders had been the trigger.

He could remember the anger that flared through him the moment he laid eyes on the Count as the madman sat behind her in the conference room, his gloved fingers running through her ponytail as she flinched at the contact. It boiled over when the sick bastard had risen up and placed his hands on her shoulders and Oliver had seen the way she squeezed her eyes shut trying to ignore the bile that rose in her throat.

Ever so gently, he rolled her over as he whispered, "You're okay now. He's never going to touch you again. I promise." The conviction in his voice seemed to bring her back as she gazed up at him, those pale, red-rimmed eyes shining just a little brighter than they had earlier.

Oliver kissed her then, his hands cupping her jaw as his fingers brushed away her tears. "He'll never hurt you again," he murmured against her lips, trying to kiss away as much of her pain as he could.

Her fingers came to rest against his cheek as she gazed up at him. He could see the onset of relief finally breaking through the fear that clouded those beautiful eyes. "Thank you," Felicity said, her voice brimming with emotions he couldn't quite place.

All Oliver wanted to do right then was try to make her forget all that had happened. He started with a simple touch, his fingers ghosting over her neck and along her shoulders tracing delicate patterns across her skin in hopes of seeing something other than pain in her eyes as he did so.

For the first few minutes, Felicity kept her eyes shut, swallowing hard when he touched spots that held the worst memories. Her neck seemed to be the place she flinched most and that's where his fingers stayed, stroking in a gentle manner before they were replaced by his lips. She sighed, and for the first time since he started this mission, she relaxed against his touch.

From that point on, it became much easier. Tender kisses fell across both sides of her neck before moving to her shoulders. Down one arm he went, his lips leaving a trail upon her skin marked by little goosebumps until he stopped at her wrist. Oliver gently took it in his hand, examining the black and purple bruises that were only now beginning to show from the zip ties that bound her to the chair.

Felicity closed her eyes again as he pressed soft kisses to the mottled skin until he pulled away and slipped his hand into hers, fingers locking together before his lips moved back up her arm and across to the other, giving it the same gentle ministrations as the first. When he heard the soft sigh escape her lungs, Oliver looked up to find the ghost of a smile on her face.

"Feeling better?" he whispered as his free hand came up to stroke back the blonde strands of hair that fell onto her face.

Felicity opened her eyes and gazed up at him, her smile widening, but still not touching her eyes. "A little," she replied, leaning forward to capture his lips for a languid kiss as her arm wrapped around his neck to hold him in place.

"I was scared," Oliver admitted, his fingers combing through her hair as they continued to stare into each other's eyes.

Her brows knitted together. "Why?"

"I didn't think I'd ever see that smile again." His voice became thick with emotions he didn't realize he was projecting until her hand came up to stroke his cheek.

"I'm sorry, Oliver." She was apologizing again, something he wished she wouldn't do because none of this was her fault. But before he could protest, Felicity added, "I'm sorry I made you worry. I'm sorry I made you kill again. I'm sorry I broke the promise I made to you a few weeks ago. I shouldn't have gone off by myself to follow that lead. I should have waited for you, but I was stupid and…" Tears threatened to spill down her cheeks again as her lower lip began to tremble.

His thumb brushed along her lips as two tears slid from her eyes. "Felicity..." Oliver breathed, pulling her to his chest while wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Felicity's face settled into the crook of his neck, her shuddering breaths fanning out across his throat as she held onto his hand with a vise-like grip. "I believe," he whispered into her ear, "you promised you wouldn't volunteer for anymore missions involving crazy people."

"Same difference," Felicity mumbled.

Oliver sat up with his free arm resting at the side of her head as he looked her in the eye. "Please stop blaming yourself," he begged, hoping the earnest tone in his voice would convey just how much he meant what he said. "This is not your fault, Felicity. The Count was going to find a way to get to me. He'd already dosed Diggle. Who's to say my sister wasn't going to be next? Or some other random person off the street?"

"But…" Felicity tried to cut in, but his fingers fell to her lips to silence her.

"No," Oliver replied with conviction. "You are not allowed to blame yourself for any of this, understood? This falls squarely on the Count. He's the one who made the decisions and he's paid for them. So please, Felicity, please stop thinking this is your fault."

She searched his eyes for several moments, then, with a reserved sigh, she nodded. "Okay," Felicity whispered.

"You're still going to do it, aren't you?" He could see the resignation in her eyes. She couldn't hide her guilt no matter how hard she tried. "What can I do to make you believe it?" Oliver pleaded.

"Forgive me," she muttered.

"If that's what it takes, then I forgive you," he said before leaning down to kiss her. "I forgive you," he murmured against her lips again. Tangling his fingers in her hair, Oliver continued to kiss her even as several more tears fell from her eyes.

When he finally pulled back, tears were still streaming down Felicity's cheeks. He brushed them away with his thumbs, cradling her face in his hands. "I don't want you to be burdened by this, okay? He was going to hurt you. I couldn't let him hurt you. I care about you," Oliver said. "You mean the world to me."

This was as close as he dared to get to admitting his feelings for her. Felicity really did mean the world to him. Without her, nothing made sense and everything would fall apart. She held their little team together with her strong moral compass and her incredible hacking skills. And she held him together with her kindness and compassion. Oliver didn't know what he'd do without her in his life.

If anyone had told him a year ago that he'd find someone to replace Laurel, he would have laughed in their face and told them to piss off. But now, staring down at the woman in his arms, he realized that what he once thought he wanted really wasn't what he needed.

His relationship with Laurel had been one full of secrets and lies. With Felicity, it was the exact opposite. She knew the darkest parts of him and never judged him for what he'd done in his life. She took his burdens and made them her own. There wasn't much she wouldn't do for him. Hell, she'd even taken a job as his personal secretary just so they could explain away their nights. As much as Oliver wanted to deny it, Felicity was exactly what he needed.

Leaning down, he kissed her again, and this time she kissed back with equal fervor. Her fingers clawed up his back before raking through his hair, sending a shiver down Oliver's spine. Soft lips trailed along his jaw and down his neck until they reached the curve of his shoulder. His Felicity was coming back to him, slowly but surely.

His hands held her face as he pulled her back up to his lips. He took his time, kissing her thoroughly as she ran her fingers up and down his back, tracing long healed scars that fascinated her, but never frightened her. She didn't ask about them, but one day he knew he'd tell her everything. For now, she remained silent on the subject and he appreciated her respectful nature.

It became harder to focus when Felicity tore her lips away from his and began leaving wet, open mouth kisses along his throat until she reached the hollow of his neck. That's where she remained as her hands came to rest against his chest and she pushed him onto his back once more. Her dominant side had returned and all Oliver could do was grin at her as she straddled his thighs.

But she paused for a moment, her lower lip worried between her teeth as she stared down at him. Sitting up on his elbows, he gazed at her. Those pale blue eyes held a tinge of trepidation. For a moment it looked as if Felicity was having reservations, which he couldn't blame her for. She'd just been to hell and back. It wasn't something one could get over in a few hours.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Oliver asked, the concern clear in his voice as he searched her eyes for any remnants of the fear she'd felt earlier.

"Yes," Felicity whispered back, a gentle smile appearing on her pale pink lips. "Please," she practically begged, wrapping her arms around his neck to pull him closer.

"If you want to stop…" he began to say, but her fingers fell to his lips.

"I don't," she cut him off before leaning down and capturing his mouth in a hungry kiss. She bit down on his lower lip, gently sucking on it before releasing and rolling her hips to get her point across.

Oliver didn't need much more encouragement than that. He willingly gave over full control to Felicity tonight, deciding it was best to go at her pace. They started slow with just her hips grinding against his as she leaned down, her mouth latching onto his neck and leaving a series of bite marks much the same as he left on her during previous encounters.

Her lips roamed lower leaving more purple welts across his skin until she reached his navel. Dipping her tongue inside elicited a feral groan from him as his fingers sank into her hair, tugging it ever so gently as her downward trek continued.

Felicity paused once she reached the tip of his cock where it rested against his lower abdomen. Her eyes flicked up, watching him intently before her lips wrapped around it, taking Oliver into the warm recesses of her mouth. He gasped, trying with all his might not to buck beneath her, but the way her tongue swirled around him made it tough. His fingers pulled away from her hair, sinking instead into the soft bed sheets while she continued her deliberate and leisurely ministrations.

When she pulled away, their eyes met once more as she said, "I'm still going to fuck you real good."

It took all of Oliver's willpower not to grab her and flip her over so she was nestled beneath him instead of being on top. The way Felicity looked at him with those mischievous blue eyes twinkling in the pale moonlight set off a chain reaction in his body starting from the top of his head and running all the way down to the tips of his toes. She had every intention of doing as she pleased and he wasn't allowed to have any say whatsoever, and it turned him on immensely.

Her kisses teased their way back up to his neck where she sank her teeth into the soft flesh over his collarbone to leave a mark that would surely garner attention tomorrow. If Oliver didn't know any better, he might have thought this was revenge for the last time he'd marked her. It could still be, and even if it was, he didn't mind. He was no stranger to odd bruises showing up all over his body. But ones that looked like bite marks? He'd figure something out in the morning.

Right now, the way Felicity's hands moved across his chest until they reached his shoulders became a distraction. Her nails scored across his skin leaving thin red lines in their wake. When she finally pulled away from his neck, her lips descended to his, wantonly kissing him with the fiery passion he'd been missing up until now.

Oliver kissed back with intensity matching her own until their lips were swollen and they needed to pull away for air. Her hand was already reaching back to take hold of his cock as she leaned down, her ass holding steady just above his hips until she had him angled how she wanted.

What surprised him, though, was just how gentle Felicity was being. The desperation in her movements had long since dissipated and she was back to being the soft one. But the dominance remained. She was going to have her way tonight, no matter what.

Slowly sinking down onto his cock, she moaned as she slid down his hard shaft until their hips met and he was completely enveloped in her hot, wet core. Another groan escaped her lips as she wiggled her ass slightly to adjust her position. Oliver felt every muscle tighten around him in the process, his hands coming to rest on her hips to steady her.

Felicity leaned forward just as she had earlier that night and captured his lips for another one of those soul searing kisses that left him breathless. She began to move slowly, her hips lifting off his before she sank down onto him again. This felt far better than it had not even an hour ago. Knowing she was feeling better now, Oliver allowed himself to enjoy every little nuance from the way she rolled her hips when he was fully sheathed in her to the way she bit his lip when they kissed.

Her arms wrapped around his shoulders, pulling him up off the bed so she was now sitting in his lap as they rocked together in harmony. His hands crawled up her sides as he buried his face in her neck and began leaving soft kisses against it. Felicity moaned when his fingers closed around her nipples and started rolling them between the calloused pads of his thumb and forefinger.

Oliver continued kissing his way along her throat as her hips swayed back and forth, the rhythm slowly increasing in speed when her hand sank into his hair, pulling it softly the closer she got to her release. He knew those telltale signs well. It started with her thighs wrapping tightly around his waist. Her fingers soon raked down his back, sinking into his skin to hold on as she threw her head back and let out a deep moan. Finally, the muscles in her legs began to quiver as her walls tightened around his cock.

There were only seconds left before she came. Oliver's fingers latched onto her hips as he steadied her above him. He could feel her tightening around him with every thrust, sending him closer to the edge as well. Two more deep, angled thrusts and she was there, his name spilling from her lips as she arched her back pressing her stomach to his chest as the waves of ecstasy washed over her for the next several seconds.

Oliver came a moment later as he dropped several kisses to Felicity's neck and shoulders, his hands splayed across her back to hold her close until they both came down off their high.

Once the last of their tremors subsided, Felicity tilted her head back up and their eyes met. What he saw in those aquamarine pools was something he hadn't expected. They were soft with unspoken emotions that Oliver didn't dare name for fear of being caught up in the moment. But as her hand came to rest against his jaw and her thumb began to stroke along his cheek, he could feel them bubbling up and nearly boiling over.

"Felicity…" He breathed her name like it was the air to his lungs. She quickly silenced him by pressing her lips to his for a soft, languid kiss that lasted several minutes until Oliver pulled away, desperate for oxygen.

"Thank you," Felicity whispered, a soft smile spreading out over her lips as her forehead pressed to his.

"For what?" Oliver asked. He couldn't help reaching out to hold her face in his hands, her smooth skin soft against his rough palms.

He gazed into those soft blue eyes and nearly got lost in them until she said, "For protecting me. For always being there for me when I needed you most. For loving me."

The world didn't tilt sideways or turn upside as Oliver expected it to when those words came whispering from her mouth. Instead, he felt a deep sense of calm settle over him, one that made all his burdens fall away just for a moment to realize he really did love her all the way down to the bottom of his bruised and battered heart.

"I love you," Oliver whispered back, his mouth finding hers once more. He couldn't keep these feelings buried any longer, not when it was clear she shared the same sentiments. "I love you so much." And he truly meant it.

"I love you too," Felicity murmured against his lips.

To hell with the fears and the insecurities and all that other crap his mind had been running over and over again trying to keep him from realizing his feelings for her, Oliver thought as he kissed her several more times. It felt right and he knew, deep down, they would make this work. They'd done a damn good job of it so far. Besides, it was nice to have something to look forward to once the day was done, and there was nothing better than a very gorgeous and very naked Felicity Smoak curled up in bed as incentive to come back in one piece.


End file.
